Monday, 3 September 2012

Ich Bin Ein Berliner


When we finally managed to drag ourselves from Amsterdam, we were left with a little under a month to see as much of that area of Europe as we could, and hopefully not spend too much in the process. The full plan took a while to formulate, but we made a decision to get the train to Berlin first, and it was a good choice indeed.  Ever since my first real jaunt around Europe back in 2009, I’ve always felt that Berlin was one of my favourite places I’d seen thus far.  The way that recent history and culture collide in the former heart of both the Second World War and the Cold War (two events which basically dominated the course of 20th century history) is astounding to see and experience.

Alexanderplatz and the
famous East Berlin landmark,
the TV tower
Our hostel was in the heart of what was formerly East Berlin, located in a leafy and quiet neighbourhood, but close to the main road, Frankfurter Allee.  Most of our use of public transport took us through Alexanderplatz, but it turned out to be more than that during our stay in Berlin.  One thing that Vancouver really lacks, in my opinion, is public space.  Stanley Park is amazing, yes, but there are few grand squares to talk about in urban BC.  While Hillary was doing some shopping, trying to replace a lost tablet charger (among other endeavours), I just hung out and enjoyed the people around me.  I watched a shoegaze-y/stoner metal band busk and try to sell CDs for a while.  I stood under a gigantic circular structure (split into the different time zones of the world) and watched a man sing Tom Petty covers as a tram rolled through the square, the number 7 I believe. Some kids behind me were trying to kickflip down a couple of stairs.



Brandenburg Gate (above)
the memorial (below)
Of course we didn’t spend all day hanging out in squares, we really explored as much of the city as we could.  The first day, we got orientated by taking a “free” walking tour (many cities in Europe offer them and they’re usually a great introduction to a city).  You’re meant to tip, but technically you don’t have to. We started at the Brandenburg Gate in the centre of Berlin, and explored outwards from there.  Personal highlights for me were the controversial memorial to the murdered Jews of the holocaust, which is essentially hundreds of concrete slates of various sizes.  They’re rather small on the outside, starting out at under a foot tall, but as you go “inside” the memorial and closer to the centre, the figures become massive, some over 15 feet high.  The reason I like this memorial so much more than most of the others I have seen, is because it is interactive, but also open to interpretation.  The message isn’t contained on a plaque of information on the outside, or a photo of a few of the millions of those killed.  Instead, it’s the feelings that the individual takes away from the experience that is the focus.  It’s a brilliantly simple idea, and the execution is spot on (in my opinion).  There are layers of controversy surrounding the monument though, the most interesting one being that the paint which coats the slates to prevent graffiti sticking to them is produced by a derivative of the company that provided the Nazis with massive quantities of the materials to make Zyklon B gas in the 1940s. Another bit of controversy results from the several million Euro paid, from the German taxpayers, for the construction of the memorial. I won’t get into all that now because we’d be here all day, but like I said: layers of controversy.




Speaking of graffiti (sort of), it’s a main reason why Berlin is such an amazing city.  I know that most people back home have a negative image in their mind when they hear this word, but Berlin is one of the capitals of the world when it comes to street-art, in all its forms. Sections of the city, especially in the formerly communist Eastern side, are covered with colourful murals and beautiful paintings. One day, we essential did a self-guided tour of all of the most colourful areas of Berlin’s underground street culture.  We started just north of the city centre at a place called Kunsthaus Tacheles.  It is a building that is inhabited with dozens of artists of all different sorts.  We wandered around and looked at paintings, sculptures, some instillations, and loads of everything in between.  I enjoyed a few of the artist’s work quite a lot, and actually bought a couple of things.  These are the sorts of things I don’t mind spending money on when I’m a tourist, because these guys are local artists just trying to get paid for doing what they love, and most of them are really good.  After exploring some of the huge bits of graffiti in the surrounding area (I Hate CBS!), and after venturing into a particularly interesting side alley filled with marvellous bits of art (the current background for this blog being my favourite piece) and independent record and comic book stores, we wandered East, through Alexanderplatz once more (god I love that place) and towards the East-Side Gallery: the largest remaining section of the Berlin Wall, a massive, foreboding structure, which was erected virtually overnight and destroyed the lives of countless thousands of Berliners. Of course, the new Berliners approach to the 21st century and the way with which they pay respect to, and learn from, their past, is always on display.  The East-Side Gallery is perhaps the most tangible example of that, as what was formerly a symbol of oppression and totalitarianism has now been covered with the work of hundreds of artists who were commissioned to fill certain spaces.   We spent maybe an hour walking around and looking at the huge variety of visual art, still essentially “street art” though.  We also went south from there to explore an area with random pieces of beautiful art almost scattered among the store fronts and sidewalks.  We stopped at a shisha bar to enjoy a hookah and a drink in the gorgeous summer Berlin weather, and watched the world pass us by.

One side of the Kuntshaus Tacheles

Someone hates CBS!

In the random side alley with cool shops and lots of graffiti



Near our hostel, in the heart of East Berlin (above and below)





"Another brick in the wall" -- at the East Side Gallery


(For any of you interested in seeing pictures of Berlin's street art, or what I saw of it, check out this album on facebook:  http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10100319245501461.2495096.21011192&type=3  I'm assuming every one who would be reading this is friends with me on facebook so seeing it shouldn't be a problem for any of you.  If you're a random and I don't know you, well that's weird but thanks for reading anyway!)


One night, while cooking dinner in our hostel’s shared kitchen, we met some people.  There were a couple of girls from USA and also a nice, but quiet Korean couple, among others. We noticed a couple of guitars in the corner and one of us made an off-hand remark wondering whose they were.  When the Korean couple piped up and claimed them, we were surprised.  We got to talking, and through some hilarious broken English, managed to communicate enough to figure out that they were basically touring around Europe and trying to play gigs wherever they could. They didn’t have any solid plans, but would basically just arrive in a new city, try to set up some shows, and stay for as long as they could still find shows to play, then move on to the next city.  It’s the way to live really, when you think about it.  Anyway, they offered to play us some music, and we of course accepted, curious to see what these two shy, previously quiet people could come up with.  They played us two or three of their own original songs (which were very good, the girl could sing very well and her husband was a great guitarist) before finishing with a rendition of Country Load…er…I mean ‘Road’ … that I will never forget.  It was one of those random moments in a hostel common area that makes the whole budget travelling across the world thing worth all the horror stories of messy bathrooms and loud, stinky roommates.

Other bits of the city that I enjoyed hanging around in included the main buildings of the famous Humboldt University (which can boast graduates such as Albert Einstien, Otto von Bismarck, and Heisenberg), and “museum island” which has some glorious squares and large spaces, perfect for a hot sunny day. The crowning jewel of Museum Island’s five permanent fixtures is the world famous Pergamon, which is, apparently, considered by many to be one of the best in the world.  A lack of funds and interest meant that our experience was limited to the outside of the building, but we enjoyed walking along the river and enjoying the scenery of the area anyway. On my last visit to the city, three years ago, I had stumbled upon a falafel stand that, I swear to god, made the best falafel I’ve ever had.  We hunted for it and before too long I had tracked it down.  They’ve grown since I had seen it last (it’s almost doubled in size) but the falafels were every bit as extraordinary as I had remembered.

Before we left Berlin, having since deciding that Prague was to be our next stop, we decided to do a tour of one of the nearby former concentration camps called Sachsenhausen, north of Berlin.  It was one of the first to be established in Germany during The Third Reich, and it was something that Hillary wanted to see.  They have kept a barracks more or less intact (one of dozens that filled the large compound) to show how the prisoners lived.  The guide spoke quite a bit about the internal political structure of the camp, and the way with which propaganda was used to hide the truth about this place from the citizens of the area. Among the many interesting things we saw there was the massive structure in the centre of the compound.  Because this part of Germany had been liberated by the Russians, this structure is a monument the “heroic” Russian soldiers.  There is, of course, controversy surrounding it, as it is a piece of propaganda in itself, but I don’t really want to write pages about a concentration camp. It was an interesting and informative day, not to mention gruesome and sobering, as I’m sure you can imagine a visit to a former concentration camp must be, so let’s leave it there. 

On that cheerful note, it’s time to wave goodbye to Berlin and look forward to the splendours of the Czech Republic.  It would be my first venture into Eastern Europe, and I hope to explore the area more thoroughly one day for sure. We boarded a bus from the main station in Berlin and set off on a six hour journey to Prague. What happened next can only be described, accurately mind you, as a proper Bohemian rhapsody. Stay tuned. 

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

From Rags to Riches


With the African experience slowing fading from sight in the rear-view mirror, it was forward towards Europe.  After eight months of cramped public transport, run-down city-centres, living off poorly stocked grocery stores, and evil death-glares by poor and angry Africans, the adjustment back into the “developed world” would be nothing if not shocking. By this point, our plans for the summer had been firmed up quite permanently.  Due to our dual-nationality status (my Dad was born in Plymouth, England), Hillary and I were able to obtain, fairly easily, British passports.  This would allow us to try and find work while in Europe which, for me (at this point), had become a necessity to even be able to afford a flight back across the Atlantic, let alone begin to tackle the quite foreboding mountain of debt I’d been accumulating since the money went dry sometime in March (I still have $2000 in traveller’s cheques sitting at home, so that will be a bit of help).  As luck would have it, old family friends of my dad and his parents own a chain of businesses in Cornwall, the south-western most area of England.  Good ol’ papa Hertzberg pulled some strings, and we both landed full-time summer jobs in Padstow.  There will be more on that later, but we still had a month to play with in Europe.  There were, however, limitations to this jaunt around the globe.  As previously mentioned, money was running tight, and moving from Africa to tourist hotbeds such as Amsterdam, Prague, and Munich, was quite difficult to adjust to.  We could no longer find a meal for a couple of bucks, we were looking at an absolute minimum of $5 any time we wanted to eat something.  Finding hostels with good kitchens and good proximity to grocery stores became very important.


Anyway, on to the action.  My flight left Nairobi on Saturday night, and arrived in Zurich early in the morning.  When I booked the ticket over a year ago, I guess I didn’t really care about future Adrian because I scheduled in a ten-hour layover in Zurich (taking a train to Amsterdam would have taken less time than what I waited in the airport).  I tried to see if I could get moved to an earlier flight, but it was a minimum fee of 200 Euro for any change.  I might have cared more if I had to wait in a dodgy African airport, like Nairobi’s or Dar es Salaam’s, but I was so happy to be in Europe at last that I hardly cared at all.  When I finally arrived in the familiar Amsterdam airport on Sunday evening, the sun was poking through the cloud and lighting the warm spring air with a beautiful orange hue.  I selected the new Japandroids album from my iPod, collected my bags from the carousel with minimum fear of my belongings being snatched from me, withdrew a large sum of cash from an ATM with no hassle from those surrounding me, walked past the designer clothing stores, and strutted out of the airport into the glorious Amsterdam evening with a grin from ear to ear.  This next month was going to be good.


As a present to Hillary and me, and in an attempt to shove the horror stories of Africa from our memories for a while, the parents had paid for us to stay in an airport hotel for three nights upon arriving in Holland.  Think about it: I had just come from staying in hostels that sometimes had power, occasionally had luke-warm water, usually had staff that would attempt to steal your things, always had uncomfortable beds and loud, smelly backpackers, and that were usually located in incredibly dangerous areas (compared to the standard I had been used to, of course), and now we were suddenly staying in a proper hotel room, with its OWN BATHROOM with HOT water, a bath AND a shower, comfortable beds (holy mother of god were they sublime), and staff that would be fired and potentially criminally charged if so much as a penny was found missing from any of the guests.  Oh and I’ve forgotten to mention to most important thing.  This hotel had, hands down, the most bitching breakfast buffet the world has ever seen.  Literally anything you could possibly want to eat or drink for breakfast was available in unlimited quantity. It was surreal.  But the cherry on top (or actually, all of what I’ve just said is the cherry, this is the ice cream and delicious hot fudge) was that I had finally returned to one of my favourite cities in Europe: the ever-glorious Amsterdam.


Welcome to Holland. Have a joint to ease the pain of the past eight months.


Now ok, some of you are probably judging me pretty hard right now, but their toleration towards cannabis is far from being the only thing going for Amsterdam.  Some of you will know that yes, I do enjoy the occasional smoke (but only on weekends and never before 8PM), and I will admit that I spent a great deal of time high as a kite, but most of my time in the city was spent exploring its beauty.  They call Amsterdam “the Venice of the North,” but really I think it should be the other way around. It’s easy, encouraged even, to get lost in the small side-streets and canals of Holland’s capital city, and as such, avoiding the unpleasant tourist tat on the main streets is as easy as “out of sight, out of mind.”  If you’d like to spend the day sight-seeing, Amsterdam has that.  If you’d like to spend the day hanging out in fantastic public parks, there’s that too.  If you’d like to learn about a huge chunk of the history of human civilization over the past millennium, well, Amsterdam’s got you covered.  And, of course, if you’d like to get fucking wasted and buy two-headed dildos well then hey, come join the party.  Honestly, Amsterdam is the place to be, for so many reasons.  We spent most of our time either in coffee shops (me) or H & M (Hillary), or else chilling in one of the city’s many stunning public parks.  Perhaps the coolest thing about the city (for me) is its integration of bike lanes into a working city.  Every proper street has bike lanes, and the traffic cycles work in bike traffic too.  This means that the drivers are that much more clever and aware, and that being a pedestrian takes on a whole other dimension.  One of the most common things to see in bike lanes near popular tourist areas is a group of tourists with their heads down, unknowingly cutting off a swerving local.  It must be frustrating as hell to live there, but I think the regulars know which areas to avoid. Hillary and I decided to chuck a modest amount of Euro and hire bikes for the day. With nowhere in particular to go, we explored the city in a random, spontaneous fashion, occasionally stopping to check out a nice coffee shop or record store.  Oh yeah I forgot to mention: Amsterdam has some of the best vinyl shopping I’ve ever seen.  I resisted the (very, very strong) temptation to treat myself to a record or twelve, mainly because there was no way I could fit them in either of my backpacks.


Being that Amsterdam is quite a popular destination for all sorts of travellers, we met new people and enjoyed the splendours of the city in company.  Of particular note were two English guys, friends since high school, one of whom was living and working in Cornwall (where I am now, weird), and one who was living in Switzerland, near Geneva.  They both had a weekend off and decided to meet up for the first time in a year, and Hillary and I were lucky enough to be in on the party.  The city was absolutely buzzing with a pre-summer kind of excitement that can’t be articulated.  Everywhere you looked friends were enjoying beers and splifs together or relaxing on patches of freshly mowed grass; it was a glorious sight. To feel like we had actually checked something significant off the Amsterdam tourist’s “must-see” list, we visited the Van Gogh museum one day.  It was a good exhibit, and contained lots of interesting information, but, with a few exceptions, I’ve never been much of a museum guy, and we were both more keen on biking around the city, stopping when something caught our eye. We don’t know if it was because we had come straight from Africa to the city of indulgence in the land of excess, but for some reason, we both loved Amsterdam and didn’t want to leave.  After six days, we finally dragged our heads out of the clouds and began to plan our next month. 


Train and bus tickets around Europe are quite expensive and, unless you can afford to be there for at least a couple of months and can afford a Eurail pass, the only thing you can do is snatch up the cheapest ticket whenever you see it.  Poor planning and a lack of funds meant that we couldn’t do an incredible amount of exploring with our month in Europe, but we settled on an itinerary of: Amsterdam, Berlin, Prague, Munich, Brussels, and back to Amsterdam for our flight to London. Of these five cities, only Prague would be new to me, but I loved Berlin the first time I’d been there, Munich was playing host to the Champions League final, and Brussels was a convenient stop off on the way back to Amsterdam.  So we bought all of our tickets in one go (to try to save a few Euro) and set our itinerary in stone.


So, as much as I enjoyed Amsterdam on my second visit, it was time to move on: to Berlin.  I was there in 2009 and it is one of my favourite cities in the world.  On my previous visit, I was fascinated not only by the visible scars of two world wars and ruins of the communist vs. capitalist fiasco, but by the vibrant and unique street-culture that had evolved there, not to mention the friendly and oh so sexy locals. If German wasn’t such a completely different language from those which I can claim some understanding of (English, a bit of French, and a tiny bit of Spanish), I would seriously consider moving there, perhaps permanently.  Come to think of it, I still might.


Anyway, we were finally out of Africa and back in familiar territory.  It was a strange adjustment, but most of it passed by in a surreal haze of spending and a lack of fear for my life.  I will soon be putting together a blog post that is somewhat different from what I usually do, and it will be regarding my time in Africa, including my feelings towards the issues of poverty, disease, and political corruption, as well as western and local attitudes towards these things, how they differ, and why it matters.  For now I hope you have enjoyed my brief account of my time in Amsterdam.  We returned there for a few days at the end of the month, so I will go into a bit more detail about the city itself in a later post.  Stay tuned for tales from Berlin, Prague, Munich, and Brussels, and also some musings on a continent lacking in capital but rich in culture.  

Tuesday, 24 July 2012

Out Of Africa


After leaving Rwanda, we had about two weeks before we needed to be in Nairobi to catch our flights to Europe. This meant going through Uganda before returning to Kenya, and it was strange being back in somewhat familiar territory.  Our bus from Kigali left early in the morning and the first couple of hours of the journey, through the rolling hills of Rwanda, with the morning dew glistening in the slowly rising sun, was a stunning departure from the country.  Any of you who have read my post about The Hairy Lemon may remember someone I mentioned named Abdel.  He was a kayaker that visited Uganda occasionally, but was living in Kigali at the time.  I wondered if maybe we would run into him, and strangely enough, he was actually on the same bus, kayak and all.  It was nice to see him and catch up.  He was heading straight to Jinja to kayak, but we were stopping in Kampala, the capital city.  The border crossing went pretty smoothly, though anything would have been better than the stress endured at that Tanzania-Rwanda border.


Upon arriving in Kampala something like 12 hours after we had left Kigali, we made our way to the hostel we had picked.  In Kampala, there seem to be basically two options for backpackers: Red Chilli’s and Kampala Backpackers.  When I was in Kampala in January, I was with Hollie and stayed with her friends who lived there, so I had not stayed in hostels.  We picked Backpackers because we’d heard several bad stories from fellow travellers about Red Chilli's, and I’ve learned that advice from fellow travellers is worth more than anything you could read in a guide-book or on hostelworld.com.  It was an alright place, the room was a little dim and the staff were a little bit sketchy, but it was a well-run hostel and nothing terrible happened there.  We had lots of fun boda-boda rides while there (the only way to get around in Kampala unless you own a car), weaving through traffic with the driver, Hillary, and me, on one bike, brought back good memories. We didn’t really do too much in Kampala besides visit some markets and half-heartedly wander around the crazy streets.  As I’ve mentioned before, we were both tiring of the mental strain of backpacking Africa, and our ambition had decreased quite a bit.


We moved on to Jinja so that I could see my friends Trina and Bhupi.  They were still living there (they returned back to their homes, Trina to NY City and Bhupi to India, in early May) and so we hung out with them for a few days at the NRE Campsite north of Jinja. It was almost exactly as I remembered it, minus one major incident. One night, we were lying in the dorm room that we had to ourselves with the light on (not really noticing because it was still light outside).  As it began to get darker, neither of us really noticed that thousands of large flying-ant like creatures were entering the room from a small hole in the window.  When it was completely dark outside, after about twenty minutes, I awoke from my little nap to find the room filled with flying bugs, like that scene from The Mummy. If you swung your arm randomly in the air, you would hit fifty of them. It was absolutely disgusting and we got out of there as quickly as we could, but had to rush back in to get our shit and move it to a different room (with no fucking cracks in the netting on the windows). Hillary was, I think, legitimately traumatized. 

Anyway, after recovering from that shit, we settled into our new room and met some people.  When Bhupi finished work (he’s a raft guide) we met up with Trina and him and had a good ol’ time in the bar, reminiscing and discussing our rapidly changing future plans.  Before too long, we managed to meet up with Hollie.  Since leaving The Hairy Lemon in January, she has been living on an island just upstream.  It is owned by perhaps the most famous kayaker in the world, Steve Fisher.  He bought it and built a small house some years back because of its proximity to some of the best big water play spots in the world.  Nowadays, he’s spending less and less time in Uganda, partially due to his island being robbed on more than one occasion.  Hollie offered to, essentially, housesit for him, and so she lives on this magnificent little island in the middle of the White Nile, kayaking every day.  I had planned on taking Hillary to The Hairy Lemon before we left for Kenya, but Hollie graciously invited us to her island to stay for a few days.  After getting a cab some 20km up a very dusty and pothole-filled road, we arrived at the ferry, which was one Ugandan man in a very leaky looking, large wooden canoe.  Trina and Bhupi, who were still living in Jinja, let us store our huge backpacks with them while we were gone so that we didn’t have to deal with carrying it to both islands, with loads of valuables and heavy things. We paid 1000 Ush for the quick ferry. Upon arriving, we found Hollie sitting on her front porch, reading a book, (probably) having a tea, next to a gorgeous view of the Nile River in the afternoon.  I immediately remembered why I had missed Uganda so much. After getting reacquainted and introducing my sister, we spent the rest of the day sipping Kahlua on the little beach at the north end of the island, and talking. The sunset was, as always, absolutely sublime.  I swear, there is nothing in the natural world that compares with watching the hot Ugandan sun slowly retire over the horizon and lighting up the beautiful White Nile. Our days there were spent in hammocks, mostly, and Hollie treated us to a very avocado-based smorgasbord of food. After being in the insane metropolitan of Kampala, staying on this peaceful island, not seeing anyone else but us three for a few days, was glorious. 


When we left, Hollie came with us as she was heading towards Kampala.  The trip back to The Hairy Lemon should, in theory, be pretty simple.  After all, it is a mere thirty seconds downstream from Steve Fisher’s island.  But, alas, this is Uganda. Our voyage consisted of four parts. First, there was the ferry over to east side of the river. Then, we arranged boda-bodas (with great negotiating skills from Hollie: “Sebo, I live here do not take me for a fool.  It is 1000 for one person so we will give you 1500 for two”) to take us a few km north to another ferry. Third, we paid 1000Ush for a ferry across to the west side of the river. Finally, we walked back south a bit, stopping to say hi to people in the area who Hollie knew (and I had heard of haha) until we got to the entrance to The Hairy Lemon, then took the ferry to the middle of the river, and Hairy Lemon island. All the while, remember, we are the centre of attention everywhere we go because this is rural Uganda and we are white people. Nothing is every quite as straight-forward as is should be, but that is some of the charm of Uganda, and Africa in general.


Well anyway, we arrived at the Lemon at about 2:00PM, and there were three other guests.  It was surreal to be back to a place that I had spent over two weeks, including Christmas and New Years, and had fallen so in love with.  It was much different this time around.  Paul (the owner) was on holiday back in South Africa, to see his family (so no frolf, sadly). With Hollie gone, Anita had taken control of most of the daily operations. But the biggest change was that it was virtually empty.  Hollie quickly talked with Anita and the rest of the staff while I said hi to them again, not certain they’d remember me.  They did however; the people who work on the island are actually really awesome, and I got to know Grace, Asid, and Anita quite well.  Hollie and I then said our goodbyes as she set off for Kampala for a few days, while Hillary and I would be leaving for Kenya in three days’ time.  Hollie, m’gog, if you’re reading this: thank you so much for everything, I never would have experienced Uganda in the way that I did without you as my guide, host, and friend.  I hope our paths meet again one day. If you ever come to North America, let me know.


So we spent a couple days on the Lemon doing what one does there: relax.  Just as before, it was great food all the time, and there was plenty of time for reading, listening to music, and just chilling out.  Since I had last been there, Paul had actually managed to complete one of his many projects, and I must say that I’m impressed.  He’s built a small wall at the top of a little waterfall on the south side of the island to create a free-flowing, natural swimming pool, complete with concrete ledges, steps, and seats.  We spent the day doing laundry there (it was perfect because the waterfall was pretty powerful with high water levels and it was great for rinsing out your clothes), but mainly just floating about drinking beer (or Coke…).  On our last day, it actually rained for most of the morning, but it had stopped by the time we were to leave. I said my final farewells to the people who keep the Lemon running smoothly, and that had become friends.  Anita kept asking me when I was coming back, but it realistically wouldn’t be for a long time, if ever. Anyway, thank you so much to Anita, Asid, Grace, Chaga, and all the rest of the staff for being such awesome friends and helping to make my time there unforgettable.


Then, it was back to Jinja via the familiar (for me) way.  Ferry over to the mainland, the most terrifying boda-boda ride of your life for fifteen minutes until you get to Nazigo, then it’s an hour long matatu ride packed to the fucking brim with people. After getting to Jinja, we picked up a few things we needed for our bus ride to Nairobi, and then had to get on one final boda-boda ride, but at least it was one we had both done before. We got back to NRE Campsite at Bujagali and began packing all our shit that we had left in Trina and Bhupi’s banda. We had one final hurrah at the NRE bar that night and I then said my final final goodbyes (there are no more after this, don’t worry) to Trina and Bhupi.  I’m fairly certain that I’ll meet up with these two again and I hope you guys are both loving life.


One. More. Bus.  That’s all we had to do, and then it was off to Europe, where getting from A to B wasn’t a gigantic clusterfuck of bullshit.  ..sorry.  OK so we got a boda-boda to the pickup point of whatever bus company we had picked (I honestly can’t remember), and were there a good thirty minutes early.  We sat and waited in front of an abandoned, destroyed coach (pretty much identical to the one we ended up boarding – except for the missing wheel).

"Connecting East Africa"-- a thousand words


As far as the actual journey, well, it was more of the same.  As the bus had come from Kampala, the only seats left were right at the back.  The border crossing was, as anticipated, bull. It was hot and unpleasant, it took way too long, we were hungry and finding suitable food was difficult, aka bus transport in Africa. One thing I will specifically mention is the border officials coming in to Kenya were corrupt as fuck.  Surprise surprise.  We knew that you could get a transit visa of up to seven days (we needed two) and avoid paying for a $50 tourist visa (good for up to ninety days), but we had to go through a whole song and dance with these assholes. After eight long months of being screwed around, this was the cherry on top, but we got our way (as was the law) and got a transit visa.


As I feared, our bus arrived after dark, and Nairobi is notoriously dangerous for backpackers after dark.  We were downtown with all our possessions, and basically grabbed the first taxi driver we could.  We got a decent rate (which I later found out was standard from our hostel to the bus stop), and got the hell out of the heart of the city.  Our hostel was, surprisingly, one of the best that I think we stayed in during our Africa trip.  It was in a nice area, had a big property so there was not much noise, it was safe and secure, and had hot water (before 10AM and after 6 I think).  It had dorms, but we stayed in a two-person semi-permanent tent, similar to the ones we stayed in on the Serengeti. With the end in sight, we relaxed a bit and tried to enjoy Nairobi as much as one can. 


We went to the top of the Kenyatta International Conference Centre which offers excellent views of the city.  After shooing away some rude Kenyans who were discretely trying to photograph us (assholes), we were greeted by an incredibly enthusiastic tour guide, Peter.  We spent the next ten minutes getting a pretty detailed but brief history of the city by pointing out things around us.  He was probably the coolest person ever, and was always making half-cheesy, but entirely awesome jokes.  He kept insisting that we had done the right thing because from the top of the tower, we could see the city by just turning on the spot, instead of trying to navigate the chaos on the ground. He never pressured us to tip, but we ended up giving him a little bit (I think he was disappointed honestly, I'm pretty sure he followed us up from the first floor when he saw mzungus were visiting).  On our way back to the hostel that evening, I was stopped by a man who asked me to help his friends and him fix their matatu.  It had gone off the side of the road and the frame was resting against the concrete, so they needed to lift the matau and get the wheel back on the pavement. It took ages and all they made me do was stand there until they were ready to lift and push it.  I think they just wanted to say that they got the mzungu to help them fix their ride. These guys were friendly and funny, so I didn't mind the hold up. That night at our hostel, I met two girls from Northern Ireland who were pretty cool. We watched some weird DVDs that they had bought on the street.  The next day, Hillary and I tried to really cram in a full day of “seeing African things” because it was our last day in Africa.  We visited the giraffe sanctuary and kissed some giraffes, before setting off for the heart of the city to find the park where you can hang out with monkeys and give them peanuts (it’s pretty legit you guys).  However, Nairobi’s ugly traffic reared its head again, and it took us forever to get from the giraffe centre (out past Karen), past Kibera (that massive slum I visited), and into the centre of town. From there, we had to scramble at the busy matatu station to find the right one to take us to the right park. By the time we actually set off, we were gridlocked in traffic once more, and it was clear that getting to the park and back to our hostel before our pre-arranged cab to the airport was next to impossible.  We jumped out of the matatu on a street choked with traffic (paying the angry conductor who said that we still had to give him money because we took up seats and he wouldn’t pick anyone else up, I’m sure he did), and went back to the matatu park, and took our last ever matatu ride in Africa, towards our hostel. We stopped for some food at Yaya Centre (y go anywhere else?) and gathered our things from the hostel.  Then it was off to the airport and goodbye to Africa, but not before getting stuck in traffic for over an hour (it had rained a bit) for good measure. Of course, by this time we were Africa experts and had planned for this, and arrived at the airport in plenty of time. Our flights left from separate terminals, so Hillary and I parted ways to meet back up in Amsterdam in 24 hours (her flight was direct, I had an eleven hour layover in Zurich…).



With one final look back at the lights on the horizon and it was goodbye to Nairobi, to Kenya, to Africa.  It was goodbye to the continent that had accommodated me during a poorly planned, spontaneous eight months. I know that I have tried (valiantly, you might say) to put my experience of Africa into words, but, as a wise man once said, “words are futile devices,” and this rings true here.  It’s a place that cannot be summarized to a friend from back home, or can truly be understood by someone who has not been there. During my eight months, I barely scratched the surface of the rich culture, incredible sights, and friendly (if sometimes intimidating) people, that Africa has to offer.  Travellers say that Africa gets under your skin, that once you go, you have to go back.  At first I didn’t believe it.  I wanted to never be stared at or called mzungu again.  But as time wore on, I realized that it’s true.  Africa is a drug, and there’s something that’s absolutely impossible to explain about it. As I set off for Europe and later England, back to the “first world,” it was a weird adjustment. I’m not sure what the next few years of my life hold, but I do hope that one day in the future I again find myself with the means to do some more globetrotting.  While there are lots of places I still need to see, many spots in Africa hold a very special place in my heart.  To everyone that I met there, whether in Kenya, Uganda, South Africa, Zambia, wherever, thank you for making the experience unforgettable: exactly what I wanted it to be. 

Thursday, 12 July 2012

Coming This Summer, only at 8900miles!

Alright so here's the deal.  I realize I've been slacking hard and haven't written a post since I was in Rwanda.  I've done much since then and for the few of you guys that actually care, I'll update my blog in the next few weeks to include:

-My return to Uganda and Kenya
-Out of Africa ==> Holland, Berlin, Prague, Munich (for the Champions League Final!), Brussels, and Amsterdam again
-England.  I'm now living in Cornwall (southwest) for the rest of the summer, making some money.
-Roskilde 2012 in Denmark which I just returned from and I'm still buzzing.

Now because I'm weirdly OCD about this, I feel the need to do everything in chronological order, but just so I don't piss myself from excitement before then, here's a quick blurb about the festival.

The estimated attendance is over 100,000 and it's one of Europe's oldest and most anticipated festivals of the summer.  This year, I was drawn there by local heroes Mew, recently reformed Swedish hardcore legends Refused, the (somehow) indie-superstar Bon Iver, and many others including M83, The Shins, Jack White, Bjork, Nasum, Baroness, The Roots, Janelle Monae, A$AP Rocky, Oneohtrix Point Never, and Shlohmo.  Needless to say, it was an amazing four days of musical experiences. But Roskilde is about so much more than that.  They have an incredible "more than music" campaign.  Before the proper festival kicked off on Thursday, there were five "warm-up" days; I was there for three of them. At "Street City" Roskilde has a massive vert ramp and excellent, professional quality skate park and bowl, and all week long they put on demos and contests, not to mention the occasional hip-hop battle or dance battle. There was also "Play City" which is several small pitches for football (soccer), volleyball courts, and loads of other stuff. Then there was "Radio City" from which Roskilde Radio was broadcast live.  There was "Swim City" where you go enjoy a dip in the lake (from the festival booklet) "...provided you are not intoxicated." Also, "Cinema City" (self-explainable), and "Poor City" (which is hard to explain...).  And then there was "Dream City" which was where I was camping.  This was an area where people were provided with the means to basically build whatever they wanted to, from sculptures to large, flamboyant, wooden stages.  The campground itself was legendary and is the main draw of the festival for the locals. Many of them say they even prefer the warm-up days, and I'll definitely go into more detail on that later. On top of all these crazy things to do in the warm-up days, there are actually two stages going as well!  Pavilion Junior (the smallest of Roskilde's six stationary venues) was showcasing local Danish bands in the hopes of exposing them to a large number of potential fans.  Also, there was Apollo Countdown, which was a stage that moved around to a different camping area each day during the warm-up.  When the "proper" festival started, it was stationed near Street City.  This venue was strictly electronic music and during the warm-up days it featured exclusively Scandinavian talent.


So there's the summary, stay tuned for the incredibly over-the-top full length versions in which I'll describe how awesome Refused, Mew, Bon Iver, Jack White....etc etc etc...were.

Mew at Orange Scene

Fear not my loving fanbase, I haven't died and there's plenty more shenanigans coming. My next post will talk about going back to Uganda and Kenya (this time with Hillary) before leaving Africa after eight, um, interesting (?) months.


Saturday, 12 May 2012

A Longboarder's Paradise


Alright, the bus ride from hell. We left our hotel in Dar es Salaam at 4:30 in the morning, sharing our cab with a Tanzanian family who were way too weirded out about sharing a cab with a couple of mzungus.  When we got to the bus depot, I started to get a little worried about finding the right one as it was a veritable clusterfuck and it was way too early to use my formidable Africa skills.  Abdul had thought this through though and arranged for our driver to point us in the right direction. We waded through said clusterfuck until he pointed us towards a bus.  The driver said to us “Burundi?” to which we replied “fuck no” (apparently it’s really dangerous right now, and you’re only allowed a three-day visa anyway). Thanks Mr. Driver-man, swing and a miss.  Our actual bus was two spots over though, and plainly marked ‘Kigali’ and so we got on. When we approached the luggage hold we were shouted at in rapid-fire Kiswahili and eventually understood that there was no room for our bags down there, which was confusing as there were about five people on the bus. But it’s always worrying having stuff down there, what with random thefts and so on, so we happily agreed to keep them with us.  When we sat down though, we were told that we had to pay for the privilege of keeping them up in this part of the bus.  We said no, we were fine with them being kept below and were not about to pay for a situation that had been forced on us.  In extremely broken English (and smatterings of Kiswahili) two workers said that the hold was full and demanded money from us.  We insisted that this was not our fault and that we weren’t paying jack-shit.  But, unsurprisingly, they persisted. It went on and on like this for probably about fifteen minutes, and it ended with me shouting at the guy and then proceeding to ignore him.  After a while he got tired and left us alone, but we were irate.  Africans are always trying to get money out of white people in any way that they can, like it runs through our blood or something.  Along with a number of other things, this is one of the reasons I are very ready to finally leave this continent.  It was not even 6AM, we were tired and not excited for our day and a half bus ride, and these fuckers were trying to get us to each pay an additional 30,000/= each for the privilege of keeping our bags up top, because the baggage hold was too full of cargo that had no right being on a passenger bus.  We were rightly pissed off, and our trip was off to a smashing start.


I’ll try to spare the mundane details, but here’s a brief breakdown of our 36-hour bus trip: it was hot, sweaty, bumpy, and bathroom/food stops were infrequent and not properly announced. When we did stop to get food or use toilets, we were never aware exactly how much time we had before the bus would leave without us (and there is no doubt in my mind that it would have) and the ‘toilets’ were disgusting and crowded.  We were also apparently the first white people in the world to have ever travelled from Dar to Kigali because, more than almost any other point during my eight months in Africa, people would not stop staring and gawking at us. By about 5PM I had finished the book that I had started that morning and boredom started to set in. Sleep was not a possibility as the road was so bumpy that every thirty seconds or so all the passengers would be jolted into the air as our driver sped over a pothole, not bothering to slow down. There were also speed bumps every two minutes which infuriated me to no end.  Why place speed bumps on the country’s main highway unless it’s passing by a small town or pedestrian busy area? Like many other things in East Africa, it makes no sense and there is NO reason for it. Every time we stopped to drop someone off or pick someone up, our bus was swarmed with people selling all sorts of shit, usually young children, and when their eyes met my window and got a glimpse of my white skin, they shoved and pushed each other to get at me.  I feel bad for these kids that are basically forced into spending their free time hawking random food and goods.  Regardless I wasn’t in the mood to entertain them and usually just closed my eyes and waited for the bus to start moving again.  At about 10:00PM the bus stopped in some hole-in-the-wall excuse for a town.  I estimated that we must be near the border by this point, and Abdul, who had arranged the bus for us, said that it would drive straight through the night, without stopping for us to sleep.  Still, I had the feeling that we were settling in, but when I got off and asked the driver how long I had before we left again, he said “5 minutes” so we rushed to use the toilets.  After about fifteen minutes, when no one else was back on board yet, I let my grumbling stomach convince me to go hunt down some food for Hillary and myself. As I approached the various food stands that were be frequented by hoards of bus travellers like myself, I was, predictably, swarmed by requests from various vendors to choose their respective stands.  I picked a friendly looking chap and dealt with the random jeers and behind-my-back jokes that the dozens of Tanzanians around me were laughing so heartily at.  I wanted chips, plain and simple, but while he was frying them up he convinced me to get some egg with it.  What the hell. The end product was an omelette of sorts, which he started to put on a plate before I said that I needed it to go.  So he dumped it in a plastic bag, poured some suspicious looking chilli sauce in with it, handed me two toothpicks (utensils, obviously) and sent me on my way.  I picked up a couple of sodas and, proud of my decent success, returned to the bus to show our dinner to Hillary, walking with the swagger of a Masaai warrior after a successful hunt. It was slimy and difficult to eat out of a plastic bag using toothpicks, but it was actually quite tasty. We then noticed that our driver seemed to be sleeping, and seeing as how we had been stopped for at least half an hour, we found unoccupied seats to stretch out on and attempted to get some shut-eye as well.


We slept until 6:00AM.  I was surprised and pleased with myself that I had actually managed a solid few hours of sleep because I am a really picky and light sleeper.  Without a proper bed, I’m useless (unless I’m drunk, then stick me anywhere). I was jolted awake when we flew over our first speed bump of the day (the first of many) and I started to think about the border crossing.  Getting into Rwanda as a Canadian is not as easy as it was a year ago.  Stephen Harper has made a lot of enemies across the globe during his stint as our wonderful PM, and the Canadian image is suffering greatly from it.  We had done what I was told we needed to do by applying for entry visas online three days earlier, but without a piece of paper in my hand, I was nervous.  We arrived at the border a couple of hours later and put our game faces on. Border crossings in Africa are never fun, and even less so when you’re not sure if you’ll get across successfully. The exit from Tanzania went fine, and we exchanged our money into Rwandan Francs (rather illegally, we’re fucking rebels shiiiiiit) when we found someone who would give us a half-decent rate. Then the sketchy part: entering Rwanda. When we finally made it to the front of the lineup at immigration, they glanced at our Canadian passports and asked me where our visas were.  Shit.  My heart sank.  I told them that we had applied online three days ago, and gave them the tracking numbers that the Rwandan government website had given me.  They did not look impressed, and I was genuinely afraid that we would not get in (for which I had no backup plan).  They made some phone calls and eventually told us it would be fine. We waited nervously for more confirmation, but after a nerve-racking thirty minutes, the proper forms (or something) came through and we paid our $30. (Thanks for that by the way Stephen.  It would have been free if you weren’t such an insufferable twat.)


With that stressful ordeal behind us, we rushed to meet up with our bus, worrying that everyone would be angry at us for stalling them.  Luckily for us though (sort of) they were just starting to search everyone’s bags.  We identified ours and opened them for the official to check through. They didn’t do a very thorough job though, and I was left wishing I had snuck in that kilo of cocaine I had my eye on in Dar (seriously, I could have gotten through with fucking anything; one wonders why they even bother checking if they aren’t going to do a decent job). After that was over (no body-cavity search this time, damn) we boarded our bus, happy that the end of this hellish journey was within reach.  From the border to Kigali it would be less than 3 hours.  That is, if the bus had left right away.  For the next 2 plus hours, the bus did not move. Some new passengers were joining us and they were apparently using the bus as a cheap way to transport cargo, and there was a lot of it.  Every time I looked out the window to see what the gee-dee hold up was, I saw half a dozen workers transporting huge sacks and boxes of who knows what from behind the bus to the luggage hold.  Every time I thought “there can’t possibly be any more” two guys carrying massive loads came into view.  I didn’t mind it for the first thirty minutes, was getting a bit anxious at the one hour mark, became irate after ninety minutes, and was downright furious when we had been sitting there for two hours. There was nothing we could do however, but just accept our fate of arriving in Kigali much later than anticipated.  When we eventually got going, the scenery around us changed instantly and dramatically. Rwanda is known as the “Land of a Thousand Hills” and it rings quite true.  The countryside was beautiful, and my anger towards the jackasses with forty tonnes of cargo quickly evaporated as we rolled over the lush green hills.  Another immediate change was that the roads were absolutely sublime. It was the first pothole free tarmac I had seen since South Africa.  I couldn’t help but think how awesome it would have been if I could have somehow justified bringing my longboard (obviously not even close to worth it, but Rwanda made me miss that sonofabitch). They also drive on the right side of the road in Rwanda.

My best attempt to get a picture with beautiful Kigali



I occasionally stopped daydreaming about bombing hills on my longboard and was randomly struck by sudden bursts of realization that I was in Rwanda: home of one of the most horrific genocides of the past twenty years.  While watching a group of kids wave at the bus from their parent’s road side shop, I couldn’t help but picture what this scene looked like exactly eighteen years previous, when, in some parts of the country, the roads were littered with rotting corpses that had been carelessly hacked to bits by ruthless machete-wielding morons. It also got me thinking about how strange it is that Rwanda has basically built their tourism industry from this horrific event.  I mean, sure, some people come to Rwanda to trek the mountain gorillas (though it can be done with higher success rates and more easily in Uganda), and the country is also worth seeing for the fact that it is generally considered the safest and least corrupt nation in Africa, but there’s no denying that most people come to Rwanda to see the genocide memorials and learn about the people’s reactions to it.  Hell, that’s why I convinced Hillary to bus across god-awful Tanzania.  We couldn’t afford to trek the gorillas, and didn’t have the time to visit the national parks and lakes of the country (and we were sick of animal-viewing by this point anyway).


After finally arriving at the main bus park, we were promptly escorted by a very persistent taxi-driver into his car.  He assured us that he knew where our hostel was (he didn’t, he had to phone them), and we soon realized that we had been ripped off quite a bit (5000 Rwandan Francs, about $10, when getting a moto-taxi, or boda-boda, would have cost us each 500), but after sitting on a bumpy, sweaty bus for the past 36 hours, we couldn’t possibly care less about losing out on a few bucks. We barely haggled and set off for Discover Rwanda Youth Hostel.  On the way, I noticed that there were many large groups of people marching with banners and wearing purple clothing and armbands. This turned out to be because we had arrived on the Friday at the end of the week long anniversary of the start of the genocide.  Exactly eighteen years before we had arrived, the genocide was just kicking off. It was quite a heavy introduction to the country, even if we had picked Rwanda to travel too mainly to learn about the genocide. 


Our hostel itself was fine; about average as far as the African hostel experience goes.  It was a bit pricey at about $15 per night, but Rwanda is a very expensive country by African standards.  It is actually meant to be the most expensive country on the continent, which is why we planned to spend only three days there. Our activities in Kigali were honestly nothing to write home about.  We spent the three days trying to avoid spending money, which unfortunately meant eating at the dodgy Chinese place up the road more times than we would have liked. The interesting thing about Rwanda though is how they play by the rules.  There are no corrupt officials (or at least we didn’t meet any, which we did daily on ever other stop in Africa), and nobody breaks the law. Some of you may remember my horror stories of reckless boda-boda drivers in Uganda carrying up to four people at a time and driving on the wrong side of the road through dense traffic.  Well, they have bodas in Rwanda as well (called ‘moto-taxis’), but these guys are legit.  They all carry two helmets (one for the passenger) and refuse to take more than one person.  I had heard from other backpackers about the legendary law-abiding that took place in Rwanda, but I was very sceptical.  I had spent the past six plus months avoiding cons and money-grubbers at every corner, so I was not ready for the lack of such annoyances.  Upon reading my blogs about Uganda, when Hillary came to meet me in Africa she assured me that there was no way she would be riding a boda.  I told her that they were virtually unavoidable, but she held firm to her conviction.  Turns out that I was right (as usual), but Hillary was able to ease into the experience by visiting Rwanda first. We eventually got to experience the read deal in Kampala, but that is for the next post.


We met some decently interesting people in Kigali. I talked at length about the NHL playoffs with this one guy from Nashville (this was back when both the Canucks and Predators were still in the running; shut up I don’t want to talk about it), and also shot the shit with a pretty interesting guy from Montreal.  Most of the time spent at our hostel though was devoted towards trying to avoid this older British guy who did not know the meaning of “SHUT THE FUCK UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP. SHUT. THE FUCK. UP!!” He was staying in our dorm, and for the first thirty minutes of conversation, it was bearable, pleasant even. He then began dominating the conversation, and turning every topic back towards how he’s spent the last few years living in Botswana and how this apparently makes him the fucking president of Africa. He must have been at the age where senility kicks in because after a while his stories just started to loop.  We hear about how people from Botswana are allegedly the “laziest people on Earth” no less than five times within an hour.  We heard him dominating a conversation the next morning at breakfast, repeating the exact same shit as he had spewed to us earlier and eliciting similar amounts of eye-rolling.  He seemed like an alright guy, but at the same time he was the sort of person that just makes you wish that everyone would slowly burn to death and you would never have to come in contact with another human being again.  Seriously, fuck that guy.


And now for the unpleasantness, and the reason for our trip to Rwanda. Eighteen years ago, all the horrors of colonization and forced racial separation that occurred pretty much across the map in Africa during the 19th and 20th centuries came to a fever pitch in Rwanda. The Belgians who had colonized the area earlier had separated the indigenous people into two groups, called Hutu and Tutsi.  The idea behind creating a distinction was complicated, but essentially it was because when the Belgians eventually left, they wanted to hand control of the country over to a group of people that could be trusted to not cock everything up. To them (and unfortunately, to a lot of colonizers) this simply meant “as un-black as possible.”  The distinction was made on the basis of many characteristics and factors, a few being height, width of nose, and how many cows a man or his family owned. (This makes me feel a bit inadequate what with my zero cows.  Sorry, this topic is gross so I’m probably gonna throw some bad jokes in here and there.) When the colonizers left and power was placed in this hands of one forged ethnic group, the other began to resent the situation, and I think rightly so. One group of people was being favoured for no real reason, and it caused a surge in ethnic tension.  This conflict of course evolved for many years in the 1980s and early 90s, but to make a long story short let’s just say that it soon got a liiiiiiitle bit out of hand. On April 6, 1994, an airplane carrying Rwandan president Juvenal Habyarimana and Burundian president Cyprien Ntarymira was shot to the ground as it was approaching Kigali’s international airport and both men were killed. The violence started immediately following this event. The repressed Tutsis began violently attacking any and all Hutus that they could find, and over the next 100 days, a messy genocide unfolded.  An estimated 1,000,000 people were hacked to bits by machetes in the streets of Rwanda, and the world did absolutely fuck all to stop it. The situation is of course much more complicated than I have made it appear in this paragraph, but for the sake of brevity, and also for the sake of not vomiting up the Subway sandwich I just ate, we’ll leave it at that.


It was an absolutely horrific event, and the scars have lasted for a long time.  The people of Rwanda have taken it upon themselves to never forget that this happened, or why it happened, and their efforts to deal with its aftermath in a positive way are inspiring.  The Kigali Genocide Memorial is free to visit, and so that’s what we did.  Upon entering the building (which was absolutely packed with people), we were immediately greeted by a 30-something woman absolutely losing her mind.  A lot of people were crying, but she was violently convulsing as if she was having a seizure.  She was being carried outside by three men who were having a hard time containing her.  I think that she was re-living some vivid, disturbing memory of 1994, but I can’t be sure.  The memorial itself is very well done, and holds no punches.  Blame is shared fairly throughout the exhibit, between the colonizers that created the artificial divide, the international community that turned a blind eye, and of course the perpetrators of the crimes themselves. After walking through the exhibits of still photos and stories written of the event, we entered a hall in which hung thousands of photos of Rwanda men, women, and children who had been killed during the slaughter.  It was a dimly lit room and the sheer number of photos was overwhelming, and emotion got the best of me.  Those that know me well might recall that I’m somewhat of a robot.  I didn’t cry when any of my grandparents died, nor when my cats died, and only a little bit when MJ died.  However, sitting in this room with the faces of thousands of people staring at me, who had been violently murdered and sometimes raped, for no reason other than that they belonged to a different artificial ethnic group, I was overwhelmed with emotion. I sat and soaked it in for a while before I had to leave.  Luckily for me, the next room contained an exhibit with real human bones and skulls that had been saved from the wreckage, and were kept by the genocide memorial society and put on display so that would-be genocide deniers could stand face to face with the hard evidence.

We thought we were finished but there was a second floor (yayyyy!) and so we marched up there, gleefully anticipating what goodies awaited us. What joy I felt when I rounded the corner to be greeted with gigantic letters reading “Children’s Room” and spent the next twenty minutes reading personal stories of various kids that had been killed.  Their methods of death were detailed very well, and were presented on handy little information boards along with their favourite foods and activities.  It was not a fun time. The final part of the exhibit was one I was not expecting.  It was a more holistic look at why genocide happens, and included analyses of several genocides of the past century.  Included were all the ones you would expect: the Nazi slaughter of Jews and other groups, the Armenian genocide, and Pol Pot’s reign of terror in Cambodia, but it also gave me some new information.  I had never heard of what occurred in Namibia in the early 20th century, to name an example, and having just been there a month previously, it shed new light on my experience there and my feelings towards the large German population of the area.


Having finally seen all that the memorial had to offer, we solemnly left and flagged down a couple moto-taxis back to our hostel. Nothing too exciting happened in the days that followed.  We did try in vein to secure last minute permits to trek the mountain gorillas, the supposed highlight of many a trip to Africa, but it was not to be.  Said permits generally need to be arranged months in advance, and the various tourism agencies that I emailed were not responding.  At a minimum price of $500 per person though, I was not overly upset about my failure in securing the permits. It was time to start planning the last leg of our trip that would see me return to Uganda (one of my favourite countries that I've been to so far) and Kenya, if only to catch my flight from Nairobi. This meant yet another lengthy bus ride across the pothole-filled roads of Africa.  We opted for an early morning bus, and woke up one morning shortly after 4:00 AM to catch a lift to the bus station. The roads were empty, which meant higher speeds, and we were each loaded with 20 kg of crap.  It was an intense ten minute drive to say the least.  When we arrived at the bus station, and after making sure that our bags were being stored in the baggage hold and not stolen, I noticed a familiar face.  Abdel was there, kayak and all.  I had met Abdel months earlier in Uganda.  He’s been living in Rwanda for the past two years and makes occasional trips to Jinja to kayak.  It was really strange to run in to him, but it immediately got me excited for my return to The Hairy Lemon, even though it was to be brief. 


The bus to Kampala was something around twelve hours and was nothing too exciting. (After the journey was detailed in the beginning of this post, nothing is worth writing about.)  The border crossing has legendary status among Africa backpackers as being one of the longest and most painful in Africa, but it was fine. After shooting all around Southern and Eastern Africa, I was finally back in a place I knew and loved: Kampala.  This time though, I would actually have to stay in a hostel (what am I? a backpacker?) instead of Hollie’s friend’s sweet digs, but it would be fine.  Anyway there’s Rwanda for you, in all its strange glory.  My next post will be a (hopefully brief) detailing of my return to Uganda and Kenya, where this whole crazy trip started. Stay tuned and, as always, keep it classy. 

Sunday, 22 April 2012

...I'm not gonna cook it but I'll order it from ZANZIBAR!!!!


After our organized 12-day safari had come to an end, it was time to enter the second part of our fam-jam.  With the parentals and Maggie set to leave Tanzania for Canada in four days’ time, we planned a trip to the island of Zanzibar. This completed our stereotypical three-week trip around Tanzania but hey, stereotypes exist for a reason. We elected to fly from Arusha to Zanzibar Island, and our plane was a small, fifteen person aircraft.  As we were boarding the plane, I was offered the front seat (which would mean I’d be sitting beside the solitary pilot with all the controls in front of me) but, being the incredible person that I am, I gave it to my dad, who has a bit of an obsession with airplanes.


Upon landing in the airport, the first thing that I noticed was how rude the people of Zanzibar seemed to be compared to those in the Northern areas of the country.  This could potentially be due to the fact that, while on safari, we were dealing almost exclusively with people in the tourism industry and were used to putting on a happy face, but nonetheless, the difference was disturbing.  The drivers that we had arranged to pick us up from the airport and drop us off at the hotel did not respond to our attempts to speak their language or thank them.  This was a more or less consistent theme throughout our visit to the island: rude locals.  Our hotel was quite nice.  It was on the beach but also had a decent swimming pool and the rooms were comfortable.  The management was nice as well and helped us arrange our activities on the island.  Zanzibar is world-famous for being one of the most consistently good dive spots in the world and while I would have liked to have put my PADI certificate to good use, I elected to not shell out $100+ for a dive, and more for the necessary refresher course (I haven’t done scuba for over a year).  Instead, we organized a snorkelling trip and that sufficed (for me anyway) just fine.  A small motorized boat picked us up from the beach in front of our hotel and the lot of us piled on, sunscreen applied thoroughly.  Our first stop was Changuu Island (commonly referred to as Prison Island).  It was, as the name suggests, at one time somewhat of a makeshift prison for soon-to-be slaves.  The island of Zanzibar has a long, disgusting slave trade history, due to its strategic location in the Indian Ocean.  Long after slavery had been abolished in Africa (including the export of slaves to the West), Zanzibar was still sneaking them all around the world.  We saw the former prison (which is now the restaurant of the super high-end resort on the island), but the main purpose for visiting was to see their tortoise sanctuary. Listed as an endangered species, the Aldabra Giant Tortoise has been the focus of a lot of efforts to conserve their population.  The centre of the island is a large fenced off area where tourists can come and see the approximately 100 tortoises.  The adults were absolutely massive, and the oldest one in the sanctuary was 175 years old (did you know you can tell their age by counting rings in the scales on their shells?). They are immense, bewildering creatures, and watching them walk is painful.  They just don’t look right when they move, lugging their massive shells around with them.  We spent maybe thirty minutes there, watching them poop and eat.  It was great fun.  (Oh one more tidbit before we leave the tortoises: you can tell whether a tortoise is male or female by the shape of the tail section of their shells. Females have a concave indent for mounting.  Awwww yeah.)


Next up was the purpose of our trip, the snorkelling.  Having been snorkelling in a number of exotic places (Mexico, Hawaii, etc) I can say that I generally don’t enjoy it very much. I don’t know why, but it just always fails to excite me.  This time however, I had a whale of a time.  It was probably due to the fact that I had Hillary’s Go-Pro and waterproof case to play with, but whatever the reason, I enjoyed it.  The scenery was not particularly spectacular, but it’s still more interesting than the stuff that we have in our ocean back home by a wide margin.  The failure of our guides to mention the numerous, and largely invisible, stinging jellyfish was a bit of a bother, but only a bit. As our trip ended and we jetted off back towards the mainland, the clouds opened up and Tanzania’s legendary rainy season unleashed itself in full force.  The timing was perfect, and we only got mildly soaked.

The gloriously warm Indian Ocean


With the ocean life viewing checked off the list, next up on our trip to Zanzibar was to take a tour of a spice farm.  Zanzibar’s history is intricately linked in with the history of the spice trade in the Indian Ocean, and a tour of a spice farm was a must. Our personal driver, who we had come to love, Mr. Simba (real name), took us to a nearby village and a local guide walked us around for over an hour, showing us the various different crops.  For me it was quite interesting seeing how, for example, peppercorn, or cinnamon grows.  These are the sorts of things that you usually take for granted when you buy/consume them, but learning about how they grow and are harvested was very interesting.  The tour itself was a little bit awkward as it was located in a village and the locals didn’t seem too keen on a big tacky group of mzungus wandering around their stomping grounds.  But they benefitted from our visit as we a. paid for the tour b. got bullied into buying products we didn’t particularly want/need and c. gave them something marvellous to look at for a couple of hours: my lovely face.  Our guide was at least very friendly and informative, but his “helper”, a young boy who followed us around, making rings, ties, and weird hats out of banana leaves, kind of creeped us out.  The tour ended with a feast of various local fruits and, as had become the norm on our trip by this point, an explosion of rain and thunder.  We bought some spices to appease their appetite for squeezing money out of white people, tipped the right people, and left.


The rest of our time on the island consisted of walking around Stone Town, which is a fascinating combination of African, Arab, and Indian culture.  We did some shopping for the usual tat, ate some Indian food, and marvelled at the glorious architecture which was mainly influenced by the large Arab population.  One night, we ate dinner at a restaurant on the top of a 5-floor hotel and it offered magnificent views of the city below, not to mention delicious food and a relaxed atmosphere.  Another night, we ate at Mercury’s, named for the greatest vocalist of all time (no arguing O_O) who was born and spent a significant chunk of his childhood on the island.  The cocktail list included such classics as the Bohemian Rhapsody (which was disgusting, shame), the Fat-Bottomed Girl (which was basically iced Kahlua aka delicious), and the Monica Lewinsky, obviously.


The culture of the island is really something to marvel at and seems to be its main tourist attraction (discounting the famed full-moon parties, of which we did not bother with; somehow I don’t think the parentals would have enjoyed it much, and this was fam-jam time, end of story. There have been plenty of opportunities for Hillary and I to get outrageously messed-up on this trip, and I have a hunch there will be many more).  There are many places along the Swahili coast in which you can relax on white-sand beaches and enjoy the warm waters of the Indian Ocean, but there is only one where you can visit the birthplace of the Swahili language and culture, and that’s Zanzibar.  The island was a fascinating collision of three seemingly unrelated cultures, brought together by its strategic location off the east coast of mainland Africa, on the way to Arabia and India.


We took the ferry back to Dar es Salaam at the end of our visit.  At the entrance to the terminal, we were hassled by disgustingly rude officials and made to show our passports, even though we weren’t crossing any border.  We even had to fill out immigration cards. I’d been told that the people of Zanzibar feel that they are separate from the rest of Tanzania, and act as such, but I was still not expecting this. Afterwards, we had to wait in the unrelenting sun for over an hour to queue for the ferry.  There were several different ships, and no form of order or organization was even attempted, but that’s Africa for you.  When our boat finally arrived, Hillary and I got our concert elbows up and shoved our way through the crowd of tourists and locals and managed to snag some decent seats for the family for the two-hour trip. It was a hot, humid, sweaty kind of day, and I had responded to my dad’s inquiry of “what are the chances this thing has AC?” with what I thought was a generous estimation of “5%” but, lo and behold, it was air-conditioned.  The journey went as ferry rides usually do and at the end, after putting up with the clusterfuck of bag reclaiming (seriously these guys have no desire to even attempt to make these sorts of things easy, or at least smooth), we dealt with a variety of touts and money-grubbing amateur porters at the exit of our terminal. We all politely declined help, electing to carry our own luggage, and while most stubbornly persisted, they eventually left us alone.  One guy though actually followed us across the street, carrying absolutely nothing, and ignoring or polite requests for him to fuck off please, and then still asked for a tip!  I was absolutely sick of people like this by that point in the day, and I basically shouted at him to fuck off, and I’m sorry but rightly so.  He did nothing, and was expecting us to start leaking money or something.  We are white after all.  In the end, my Dad caved, but didn’t have any small cash on him, so gave him a 100/= coin.  At first I was pissed off that this guy actually managed to get money from us, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that it was better than giving him nothing at all.  100/= is about 7 cents, and it was somewhat of an insult to him to have gotten that as a tip when he would have been after, at the very least, 2000/=.  As I thought about it in the car later, I was pleased with the end result. “Thanks for nothing asshole, here’s a dime.”  Maybe I’m being over-the-top here, but god damn these people were starting to really get on my nerves.


Hillary and I said our teary goodbyes to our family once more shortly after arriving on the mainland, as they were flying that night.  And so another chapter of the Hertzberg/M’Gonigle family’s vacations came to an end.  We’re a family that has always enjoyed going away, but this was definitely the most ambitious trip yet.  When I left Africa nearly 8 months ago, my mum said she would come meet me for a few weeks at some point in my trip, but it soon evolved into a meeting of epic proportions.  We’ve had our ups and downs when it comes to family vacations, but for whatever reason, this was easily the best one yet.  If you guys are reading this: thank you so much for a. coming to meet me during my year abroad and b. resisting the (I’m sure overwhelming) urge to tear each other’s heads off.  I love you guys and I enjoyed our time together in Tanzania more than I am able to effectively communicate.  Thanks for paying for everything (and I do mean everything) and making me temporarily forget what it’s like to live life as a dirty, cheap motherfucker. 


Hillary and I then wrapped our heads around the prospect of travelling like cheap bastards once more, a concept that had been disregarded during our rather lush fam-jam. Our next stop was to be Rwanda, and we had visas and transportation to sort out. Canadian USED to be allowed free entry to Rwanda, but this was before Stephen Harper ruined everything ever.  Long story short (I’m not really in the mood to rant anymore), most of the world used to like Canada, but they now mostly hate us, thanks to the fucking abhorrent international policies of Harper’s brilliant government. Rather than be able to show up at the border with no prior arrangement, Canadians now have to apply for visas at least 3-days ahead of time, and pay $30 to gain entry.  What’s more is that they require you to be very specific about your time and place of entry, which we were not completely sure of.  We were at first considering flying from Dar to Kigali, but when that turned out to be over $900 (what the actual fuck), we elected to take the gruelling bus journey across the country at $32. On paper, it was meant to be 26 hours, but it ended up being 36 of the most uncomfortable hours of our lives, but that’s a story for my next post.  When we finally had visas and transportation arranged we had a few days to wait in the glorious city of Dar es Salaam.  As I said earlier, the city is not welcoming in the slightest, and is dirty, loud, and frankly not worth your time.  Unless you have a specific reason to be there, avoid Dar es Salaam at all costs.  Seriously, the place sucks mad ass. But there we are, alone again natura-diddly. The manager of the New Bondeni Hotel (Abdul, I mentioned him in the last post) told us he would take us out and show us the “real Dar” one night and we accepted his offer.  We met him in the lobby at 11:30 PM one fateful night, and climbed into a car having no idea what was coming.  It started off innocently enough as he showed us his favourite place to come and relax or think, which was on the peninsula, and was a quiet little place by the beach.  We spent twenty minutes basically just standing there, with Hillary and me awkwardly trying to make conversation.  After that had finished, he told us it was time to “shake our bodies”.  Now I’ve got nothing against nightlife or getting crunk, but this was a different scenario.  Abdul is a nice guy, but he makes us both feel awkward and we were not in the mood to go clubbing.  We didn’t say this of course, and got dragged to an, admittedly popping, local haunt.  I had been drinking in preparation, and so was slightly buzzed and therefore slightly more willing to deal with the heaps of awkwardness that were flung our way, but it was still weird.  Here we were, two white people standing on the spot in a place that had probably never seen a tourist ever, at 1:00 AM, with Abdul, a skinny Indian man who would occasionally, at seemingly random intervals, perform some variation of the sprinkler in the direction of the bewildered dance floor. So for over two hours, we stood, rooted to the spot, sipping on beer and watching the locals “shake their bodies”. Sure we could have gotten more involved, but we were not up for it, sick of pretending to enjoy Dar es Salaam, and it was an insanely awkward scenario.  The dance floor was weird enough without the added presence of my earth-shattering moves.  Some of the people there must have been on drugs, because most of them just stood in front of the mirrors, staring at themselves, and moving their arms and legs in a manner that resembled…I don’t know how to finish this sentence.  It was like nothing I’ve ever seen, and I’ve partied with some reallllllly drugged out people before.


At about 3:00, we were finally escorted back to the hotel, only to have Abdul tell us that he was heading back.  Why? Why was he doing this? He looked just as awkward as us, and for the over two hours that we stood in that club, he did literally nothing.  It wasn’t like he was on the prowl or loved dancing, or maybe he just didn’t show us in front of us.  Either way, what was going on in that club was not fun for anyone involved, and I have no idea why he wanted more. It was a really nice gesture of him to try and show us the night life of the city he apparently adores so much, and we were polite throughout the whole ordeal, but it was not an enjoyable night at all.


And that was the most exciting thing that happened on our last few days in Dar es Salaam as we counted down the minutes until we would be leaving that horrid city.  Our next stop was Kigali, but not before the longest and arguably least pleasant bus journey of my backpacking career.  We woke at 4:30AM one fateful morning and packed our lives away once more.  But the good times that followed is a story for another day.  I hope you enjoyed this post. The next one will detail our looooong bus ride across the length of Tanzania, good times at the Rwandan border, and the unique city of Kigali including the 18th anniversary of the horrible genocide of 1994 in which at least 1 million people brutally lost their lives to the ethnic confrontation between the Hutu and Tutsi while the rest of the world disgustingly ignored what was happening. Are you pumped?  You’re pumped, I can tell.  Keep it classy dear readers, until next time.